Ephesians 5:22-33 Principles Of Christian Marriage

by | Jun 21, 2023 | Ephesians, New Testament

I. Some Christians Have A Wrong View Of Marriage

A. Getting Back To The Truth Read 2 Chronicles 29:3-9, 16

1. Hezekiah was a king in Israel who brought revival and repentance to the nation.
2. They had forsaken God and turned to idols.
3. God’s judgment had fallen upon them, because of their sins.
4. Hezekiah was raised up by God to restore right living to the people of God.
5. He did so by clearing the rubbish & debris out of the Temple of God.
6. When the rubbish was cleared out, then they began to get back to right living with God.
7. In our lives as Christians, sometimes we neglect right living with God.

a. We allow rubbish to accumulate in our lives.
b. We reject God’s ways and begin to embrace our own ways of thinking.
c. We adopt worldly, carnal ideals about life.
d. Wrong thinking will lead to wrong living, including ungodly ideas re. marriage

8. The remedy for Christians who are experiencing problems in marriage is always to return humbly to the truth of God’s Word, which shows us God’s design for marriage.
9. If truth re. marriage is found anywhere, it is found w/God’s people, in God’s church.

a. 1 Timothy 3:15 but if I am delayed, I write so that you may know how you ought to conduct yourself in the house of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and ground of the truth.

B. Why People Have Incorrect Views Of Marriage

1. Some grew up in dysfunctional (sinful) homes & have no right model of marriage.
2. Some became Christians later in life and are still learning about marriage.
3. Some experience failure in their marriages & become cynical about marriage.
4. Some have not taken the time to learn from God’s word about what a godly marriage is.
5. Some make the mistake of adopting the world’s ideas of what marriage should be.
6. Our goal this morning is to clear out any confusion about marriage.

a. No Christian would claim to know everything.
b. However, many would wrongly claim to know everything about marriage
c. We cannot hold any view marriage that is contrary to God’s word
d. Every Christian must have God’s view re. marriage, whether married or not.

7. First, we do as Hezekiah did. We clear out that which does not belong.
8. Proverbs 3:5, 6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.

II. Wrong Views Of Marriage

A. Marriage Is Built Upon Physical Attraction And Physical Gratification

1. Some people never think any deeper about marriage than this.
2. Their basis for getting married is purely for physical gratification.
3. They seek to legitimize their desire for passion. Passion is the driving force to marry.
4. They never see marriage as being any more important than this.
5. Hebrews 13:4 Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled. (precious, held in honor, esteemed)
6. Marriage ought to include passion, but it is much more than passion.

B. Marriage Is An Institution Developed By Man

1. Cultural anthropologists claim man developed marriage as he became more civilized.
2. As man went from the ape like species to a more human species, man saw the benefit of a monogamous arrangement, for the purposes of emotions, children, finances, security and stability. That elevates ‘felt needs” over God’s design.
3. This view misses the fact that God instituted marriage and excludes God.
4. That would allow for the redefinition of marriage to meet ever changing felt needs.
5. That is an unbiblical approach to marriage and will change with the culture.

C. Marriage Is A Necessary Evil

1. Some people think that marriage is inevitable, but that you can expect the worst.
2. That you might as well get married and just hope that the good outweighs the bad.
3. This mentality towards marriage is so popular, that we see it in comic strips, cartoons,
4. Stand up comedians joke about it, sitcoms write about it, etc.
5. This view misses the fact that God says marriage is a good thing and meant to be a blessed and holy union between a man and woman.

D. Other Assorted Views

1. Get away from their parents.
2. Looking for fulfillment and purpose. Looking to “find themselves”.
3. Wrongly think that marriage will heal an unhealthy dating relationship.
4. Afraid of being alone. Want to have the family/stability they never had as a child, etc.

III. God’s Design For Marriage

A. Lifelong/Covenant Relationship

1. Malachi 2:14 Yet you say, “For what reason?” Because the Lord has been witness Between you and the wife of your youth, With whom you have dealt treacherously; Yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant.

a. Covenant- alliance, pledge, agreement

2. Hebrews 13:5 “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”

B. Mutually Blessed Relationship

1. Companionship; Oneness

a. Ephesians 5:31

2. Friendship & Communication

a. John 15:13-15 13Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends. 14You are My friends if you do whatever I command you. 15No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you.
b. Matthew 26:36-38 36 Then Jesus came with them to a place called Gethsemane, and said to the disciples, “Sit here while I go and pray over there.” 37And He took with Him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and He began to be sorrowful and deeply distressed. 38Then He said to them, “My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, even to death. Stay here and watch with me.”

3. Sexual Gratification

a. 1 Corinthians 7:3-7 3Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 4The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 6But I say this as a concession, not as a commandment. 7For I wish that all men were even as I myself. But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that.

C. Spiritual Relationship Ephesians 5:30-32

1. Christian marriage is an example of the relationship is between Jesus & the Church

a. John 3:28-30 28You yourselves bear me witness, that I said, ‘I am not the Christ,’ but, ‘I have been sent before Him.’ 29He who has the bride is the bridegroom; but the friend of the bridegroom, who stands and hears him, rejoices greatly because of the bridegroom’s voice. Therefore this joy of mine is fulfilled. 30He must increase, but I must decrease.