Read 1 Peter 3:1-2 – Submission in Marriage
1. Though we can learn much through these verses about the husband/wife relationship, it is helpful to remember the culture in which this letter was written. It was unthinkable for a wife to adopt a different religion than her husband. The wives that Peter addressed had questions: Should I leave my husband? How should I treat him? Now that I have Jesus, am I in a position to lead him? Peter addresses this unchartered territory in these verses. Describe the marital tension that may have been caused by the wife’s new relationship with Jesus.
2. Submission means to place yourself under the authority of another. It does not mean to be held or forced under the authority of another. Why is this an important distinction?
3. Verse 1 refers to an unbelieving husband: one who is in active disobedience to God’s Word. According to verse 1, how might God use a woman who places herself under the authority of her husband?
4. Comment on this quote: The benefit of submission is shown in the way that it affects husbands for God. A wife’s submission is a powerful expression of her trust in God. This kind of faith and obedience can accomplish great things, even without a word. – Guzik.
5. (vs 2) How would you describe “chaste conduct”? What does it mean when that conduct is accompanied by fear? (note: fear in vs 2 means reverence for God)
Read 1 Peter 3:3-6 – A Gentle And Quiet Spirit
1. This section begins with “do not let.” This makes it a choice that each woman makes: the choice between merely outward adornment or inward adornment. Describe the difference.
2. A question for consideration was presented in a Bible study: Do you spend more time
preparing your outward body for the day, or your inward heart, your spirit? It was a startling, but routine changing thought for many. How does 1 Sam. 16:7 add to the importance of this priority?
3. According to verse 4, what is very precious in the sight of God?
4. Some would say that their God given personality is not gentle or quiet. How would you respond to this statement? Consider Gal. 5:22-23, Eph. 4:1-3, and Phil.4:5.
5. Verses 5 and 6 remind us that the ideas that Peter is presenting are not new ideas, but rather they can be seen in godly women of the past. How is Sarah described in these verses?
6. Often submission requires faith: faith in a good and mighty God who is faithful to His promises. How does faith apply to verse 6b?
Read 1 Peter 3:7 – The Godly Husband
1. The instruction to “dwell” is more than just residing together. It has the sense of permanency and family commitment. A husband should dwell with his wife with understanding. What kind of effort is required to really understand a person? Now take into consideration how differently men and women approach life.
a. Consider this quote: A godly husband should be intimately aware of his wife’s needs, her strengths and weaknesses, and her goals and desires. He should know as much about her as possible in order to respond in the best way to her. – NKJV Study Bible
b. According to Eph. 5:25, in what way is a husband to love a wife? That is a very high bar! What is required for a man to love in such a way?
2. Though a wife is instructed to submit to her husband, the husband is instructed to give honor to the wife. Therefore, as she submits, she should never be made to feel like an employee or that she lives under the heavy hand of a tyrant. How can a man make submission easier for his wife?
3. God created man to be physically stronger than women, therefore she is the weaker vessel. But they are “heirs together of the grace of life.” What does this mean?
4. When a husband treats his wife as he is commanded in this verse, what does the verse tell us will be the result?
5. Peter assumed that the fear of hindered prayer would motivate Christian husbands to love and care for their wives as they should. Many Christian men have such a low regard for prayer that this warning may not adequately motivate them. – Guzik How do you regard prayer?
An important observation: Verses 1-6 are addressed to the wife. Verse 7 is addressed to the husband. It is not the role of the wife to correct the husband when she feels misunderstood (though it is healthy to express our feelings in love), nor is it the role of the husband to teach the wife submission. These attitudes and actions are developed in a person as they surrender their lives to the Lord. Each spouse should prayerfully yield their lives to the Holy Spirit, who teaches and trains us in godly living.
Another important observation: the instructions given in verses 1-7 are not conditional. It does not say that a wife should only submit to her husband if he is dwelling with understanding, nor does it say that a husband should only treat his wife honorably if she submits to him. (Note: any spouse living in an abusive situation should seek godly counsel. Abuse is not God’s intention for you.